{{Have you ever loved someone who has learned to hate himself? It has been my frustrating experience for two years now. It began at the local carwash, and he, a whisper of a man, too good-looking for his own good. }}
There was no clue, at least in his person, of substance abuse. The red flag showed two days after our first date, he borrowed money and promised to return it in no time, but he looked tipsy.
He ignored my calls thereafter. He borrowed more money when we met two weeks later, his had pawned his car’s stereo to pay some debts, he needed to redeem it before the deadline and I get to keep it until he paid me back, I happily did it and also surrendered it back to him in any case, he needed it more than I did two days later he had sold it.
Most times when he has offered me a ride home the car gets stuck and I get to buy fuel he will also not surrender my change. He has also knocked down a pedestrian in my presence while intoxicated.
His spare tire and jack are missing. I also cannot leave my purse around unattended , as I have found it is contents missing more times than I can account for. He once snatched it from me and emptied it, he needed a drink so bad, so he explained later.
In the two years that I have known him he has stolen my money, grabbed my airtime to redeem for alcohol, beaten me senseless, lied to me severally, sold my two phones, cheated on me, and emotionally abused me.
I have also since been excommunicated from my church for dating a non-believer as well as being seen in questionable places like club, places I go to make him happy.
I sometimes think that I am sick retarded or bewitched, tired of counseling me
my friends have adopted the give her eyes mode, looking at me sympathetically, when I meet them with the occasional black eye, bandage or a sore mood. I ignore them as I have also failed myself..
I used to think that such abuse is experienced by those from an abusive childhood, poor or ignorant backgrounds, but I have been raised up in a stable family, am beautiful and in my final year in a prestigious university(United States International University).
He claims that he would drown in alcohol if I left him and that I make him a better person when we are together, but he slips back to alcoholism each time I oblige.
Am in need of special help for there is no single day that I wake up and not love him, despite all that he has done.
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