Category: Social

{Some of the things you do in life are the things that are possibly hindering your growth or success.}

If you want the best for yourself, you must stop doing these things now:

{{1. Stop running away from your problems }}

Don’t be afraid of facing your problems; running away from it won’t make it go. Learn to face your problems head on so it doesn’t get worst.

{{2. Quit spending time with the wrong people }}

You should know who’s good for you and who isn’t; who would bring you down and who would help you get better. Quit spending time with the people who aren’t right for you.

{{3. Stop trying to be someone else }}

You would never fit in when you try to be someone else. Be yourself and be proud of who you are.

{{4. Stop deceiving yourself }}

You can deceive others, but you can never deceive yourself, and it would be foolish of you to do that.

{{5. Stop procrastinating }}

Stop thinking you aren’t ready, stop thinking the time isn’t right, because the time to do what you want to do is now. Time waits for no one.

{{6. Stop letting other people determine your happiness }}

Stop letting other people make you unhappy and miserable and stop depending on others for your happiness. Learn to always find happiness by yourself and in whatever you do.

{{7. Stop being afraid of love }}

Love is a gift and a beautiful thing. Stop being afraid of it; learn to give it a chance.

{{8. Stop being afraid of following your passion }}

Don’t be afraid to follow your passion, because you would most likely regret it when you are old.

{{9. Stop killing yourself because of a past mistake }}

You made a mistake in the past. So what? Move on from it, but learn from it.

{{10. Stop living your life to please others. You can’t please everyone.}}

{{11. Stop letting what people would say stop you from living. People would always talk, and people would always have harsh things to say. Don’t let it stop you from living your life.}}

{Students of Runda Technical Secondary School in Kamonyi District were on July 8 lectured on the emerging global security threat of trafficking in human being and people smuggling as part of the Rwanda National Police ongoing awareness to raise the flag against the modern-day slavery.}

Inspector of Police (IP) Athanase Niyonagira, the District Community Liaison Officer (DCLO) of Kamonyi, while speaking to the students, noted that some people who have fallen victims are blinded by life-changing promises in their final destination.

“Don’t be carried away by the so called jobs abroad; know the people you are dealing with, talk to relatives, leaders and Police. By doing so you will unearth the truth behind the offers because one of the tricks traffickers use is to try to manipulate you not to disclose the promises to anyone,” IP Niyonagira said.

He emphasized that human trafficking is a reality they should be concerned about and to partner with police to raise the bar high against human trafficking and report anyone that approaches them with such offers.

IP Niyonagira also tackled other issues related to abortion, drug abuse, fighting genocide ideology and their role in timely exchange of information on suspected criminals.

Gadi Ishimwe, one of the students thanked Rwanda National Police for enlightening them on human trafficking adding that this prevents them from falling victims and challenges colleagues of their role in crime prevention.

The school head-teacher, Hortence Ingabire also commended the police for tutoring the young generation and appealed to the students to heed the message and be the voice of change in their respective communities.

{Sometimes men are hesitant to ask for what they need in the bedroom because he is probably worried he might hurt your feelings.The problem with him not asking is that you might continue making the same mistakes.}

Below are 10 things men wish women knew about sex

1. Keep things exciting in the bedroom by taking control every now and then.

2. Stop being a dead wood in the bedroom. There is nothing more discouraging than having a partner who seems disinterested in bed and shows no enthusiasm.

3. If your man is doing something wrong in bed, he expects you to tell him about it. Good communication is needed in the bedroom. Tell him what’s working and what he needs to improve on.

4. Stop being too worried about how you look when your clothes are off. He needs you to love your body.

5. Sometimes his member down there might not respond in the bedroom and this isn’t because you are unattractive or not good enough in the bedroom. Not being in the mood, stress and other things can affect him down there.

6. Just because your ex loved it doesn’t mean he would love it. People are different.

7. Forget the story about men thinking about having some bedroom action every minute. Sometimes, we are just not in the mood for some action in the bedroom.

8. Don’t be shy to ask for what you want in the bedroom. He isn’t a mind reader so don’t expect him to know what you want.

9. Don’t always wait for him to initiate. If you are in the mood for some action in the bedroom, please feel free to go for it. We love it when you initiate sometimes. It shows that you find us desirable.

10. It’s not fun when you do things grudgingly in the bedroom. If you are not comfortable doing it, please don’t do it.

{Women are widely adjudged to be very secretive people, but unknown to many, men are the most notorious of the two sexes when it comes to keeping secrets. Even when they’re deeply in love or married to you, men still find it difficult to completely open up to their partners about certain things, and the reason isn’t far-fetched from the fact that we men are emotionally distant people than women. When women love, they love with everything, and trust their partner with all (or most) of their secrets, but men withhold some information from women either because they want to protect them…or they just want to protect themselves.}

Let us leave the “whys” for another time. So what do men like to hide from women? I know the ladies are itching to know, so I’ll cut right to the Chase. I bring you 4 major secrets men keep from women.

{{1. How we really feel }}

Like I said before, men are emotionally more uptight than women are, so what the woman may be comfortable to talk about, we men tend to feel just the opposite over. For instance, men are extremely jealous people; even though we may not say it, we are never okay with our women laughing at another man’s jokes or keeping certain male company. It makes us feel a bit inadequate, but we just bottle it all up.

A man can catch feelings in a “no strings attached” kind of relationship and be very quiet about it simply because he doesn’t want to appear too emotionally weak. It’s not really pride, it’s just the way we are.

{{2. The actual size of our bank accounts }}

No matter how deeply in love we are, not too many men would tell you how much they really have. There are two reasons for this; some men are naturally secretive and like to withhold certain information from their partners, especially when it’s about money. Men like this also do not like to discuss their future plans and projects with their partners, they prefer to use the surprise element because they get a thrill from it. For men like this, keeping their women in the dark concerning their plans and finances is the way they remain in charge.

The other reason is quite simple; some women are like leaches, the moment they realize that you’re financially strong, they go all out to suck you dry. For fear of this, we keep our financial info private.

{{3. Past life /love affairs }}

If there’s something men fear the most to tell women they love, it’s the number of women they have had in the past; for men, it’s a no, no! The reason is because we want to protect our reputation; I mean, no one thinks you’re responsible if they learn you’ve been with more women than a midwife or maybe you preferred older women for sex. Lol; info like that always taints one’s image. Besides, most women react to such information adversely, so to protect both our reputation and the relationship, we keep stuff like this secret.

{{4. Our sexual fantasies and performance fears }}

Most men like oral sex, masturbating, sexual domination, etc. Some even like spanking their partners, and prefer specific positions during sex, but for fear of being branded “perverts”, we keep them in our head.

Men also have performance fears. Believe me, no matter how much reassurance you give a man, he’ll still have doubts about his sex skills. Sometimes, it’s because he feels his organ is inadequate, but more often than not, it’s all in the head.

So there, ladies, now you know what secrets men love to keep from you, but can you really blame us?…it’s how we are built. *wink*

{It takes two to tango but it takes two good persons to make the tango even better.}

Below are 15 pieces of advice that will help every woman have a good time in bed with her spouse.

1. Your man can’t read your mind so don’t be scared to ask for what you want in bed.

2. Stop faking it in bed.

3. Stop being selfish in bed. You shall receive freely if only you are happy to giving.

4. If you are not comfortable with it, don’t try it.

5. No one should pressure you into having sex. You don’t always have to say “yes” to your partner in bed.

6. Be free to express yourself in bed. If you feel like you want to scream, just scream. It’s your right to express yourself in bed.

7. You have to love your body if you want to have a good time in bed. Having a low self-esteem kills passion.

8. Try initiating sometimes. It’s cool. He doesn’t have to be the one to initiate it.

9. Dirty talk in bed.

10. Pay attention to your lingerie. Wear something nice and sexy.

11. Great sex takes practice so never write him off after the first time.

12. Your man should put your pleasure before his. A man who is selfish in bed isn’t worth it.

13. Don’t be rigid in bed. You should be open to trying new things in the bedroom with your spouse.

14. Never take a man who thinks foreplay is optional seriously.

15. When you are in bed, you should learn to let go of your worries and have fun.

{I was having a conversation with some really good friends today, it was based on relationships of course, and somewhere along the line, one of them (my friend) popped the question — do you have to disclose your passwords to a woman you’re with, to prove you really love her? I’m talking passwords to social media pages, accounts, mobile phones, computers, etc. Of course, it pretty much provoked a lot of reaction from all of us, and we were divided in our opinions.}

Personally, though, I don’t see passwords as necessary criteria for proving the amount of affection you have for a woman or man, as the case may be. I want to believe that as persons, we should be entitled to keeping some things to ourselves, especially stuff as personal as passwords. Unless it’s a marriage relationship where the couple know and trust each other completely, I think it’s ill-advised to give out one’s passwords to someone they’re just dating, for all you know, they can change overnight, and decide to use such information against you. I don’t even think it’s appropriate for a woman or man to blackmail their partner into giving them their password in the name of love; that is immature, and should be discouraged.

As I mentioned earlier, unless you’re their husband or wife, you’re not entitled to knowing their passwords, and even then, it should not be your call to make, but theirs. Certain levels of trust have to be earned, and if your partner hasn’t given you access to every detail about their life, it simply means you have not earned it. Trust is earned, not forced out. That is my opinion.

{A survey by DirectTV asked 2,000 participants about the lies they have told in their lives and interestingly, most of the lies told are related to sex.}

Check the common lies people tell before sex below

{{1. “I’m on birth control”}}

This is why it’s always important to use protection because you never know if your partner is telling a lie about using birth control. According to the survey by DirectTV, this is the most common lie people tell.

{{2. “I’m not just looking for sex ”}}

This is another crazy lie most people tell and I think guys are the culprits here. Most guys use this lie to pretend they truly want a woman and are not after her body. The ladies can always testify how many guys have told them this lie. No wonder it’s second on the list.

{{3. “I’ve slept with x amount of people ”}}

While most guys are guilty of lying they are not looking for sex when trying to date a woman, women are mostly guilty of lying about the number of partners they have had in bed. It’s rare to find a woman who is actually truthful about the number of guys she has slept with. Guys also lie about the number of girls they have slept with. While guys exaggerate the number of girls they have slept with, ladies tend to reduce the number of guys they have slept with.

{{4. “You’re the first person I have ever done this with”}}

So many people have been told this particular lie before sex. I have read about ladies lying to their that he’s their first while I have also read about guys lying to a lady that she’s the first person he is performing a particular act on bed with. I have even read most guys lie to women that she is the first woman who he is going down on. Lol. I really don’t understand how telling this lie helps the liar.

Can we just be honest with our partners in bed?

{Sex is meant to serve as a useful tool in a relationship; minus the fact that it’s for reproduction, sex is pleasurable, it connects partners together, it has health benefits as well, it’s a major area in a relationship.}

With all the good benefits of sex, if not careful, sex can also ruin a relationship; sex can create a divide between partners. Same way so many couples have become even more united is same way so many have become divided through sex.

{{1. When a partner always asks for sex }}

Everyone has different sexual behaviour, some would rather have sex 2-3 times a week, some would prefer once or twice a week or once in two weeks while some would rather have it every day or even more than once a day and you just wouldn’t point accusing fingers at them. This variation in sexual behaviour can actually lead to a break down in the relationship; to avoid this problem, couples have to communicate better.

{{2. When a partner is sex starved }}

When a partner is repeatedly starved of sex, it can gradually tear that relationship apart. People should really be careful when it comes to matters of sex as sexual problems can lead to other problems in the relationship. We once carried a report of how a disgruntled husband did a spread sheet of how many times his wife has refused him sex; that’s as a result of sexual starvation and it can kill a relationship.

{{3. When partners are too busy or too tired for sex }}

This is also another way sex can kill your relationship; sex creates intimacy, it builds togetherness, and when a relationship loses this, it can gradually affect the relationship and both partners won’t even know. Couples with extremely busy schedules should try to create time for late night dates and then it can lead to some action and their intimacy would hardly suffer.

{{4. When the relationship becomes sexless }}

This is another relationship killer; most marriages turn into this over the years and it can gradually kill the relationship without both partners knowing. Sometimes this act could be as a result of trust issues, resentment, frequent quarrels, anger or even the gradual loss of feelings and emotions in the relationship, and this can kill the relationship.

{{5. When one partner withholds sex }}

This is one trait that’s common in relationship; most times people withhold sex from their partner just to prove a point, this really can be frustrating and it can create further problems rather than solve.

{{6. When one partner controls the frequency of sex }}

When it comes to relationships (the sexual part especially), there should be no boss, no one should be a dictator of when and when not to have sex else it would actually kill the relationship. When there is no spontaneity with the sex, it would be boring and just a plain mechanical activity; when one controls the frequency of sex in the relationship, it would definitely suffer.

The issue of sex is one line that should be threaded carefully else the relationship would break down like a house with bad foundation. Communication is the key to having good sex.

{Sleeping naked might sound awkward to many; as a matter of fact, it is done by only a few number of people; most people won’t even feel comfortable sleeping naked as sleeping with your clothes on just gives you that sense of protection and that I understand.}

However, it might surprise you that sleeping naked might have a lot of benefits which you aren’t aware of.

Get ready for a shocker as I share with you eight reasons why sleeping naked would actually do you a lot of good.

{{1. Self-confidence }}

Not everyone is thrilled with the way their body is, and when you have low confidence about your body, it would definitely affect your relationship. Just like yoga, sleeping without clothes on would give you confidence; it would help you get used to your body and no matter how awkward your body might look, you might get used to it and build your confidence up.

{{2. Your privates need it }}

Sleeping naked in a good environment would help your privates in more ways than one; most especially for the ladies. The odour that oozes out of some lady’s organ might not be friendly but sleeping naked can actually curb that. Sleeping naked would allow ventilation around your privates hence keeping a check on yeast and bacteria.

{{3. You have better sleep }}

You just might have a better sleep when you sleep naked as there would be no discomfort from your clothes to wake you up. Sleeping naked would make you feel free; while your clothes serve as an extra burden if it’s worn when sleeping.

{{4. Less feeling of being sex-starved }}

Many married partners get sex starved and don’t even know how to communicate to their partners that they want more action in the sheets. Sleeping naked just might be what you need; sleeping naked makes sex easier; even if your partner might seem so tired, the attraction of a hot body by his/her side might be enough temptation to just get some fireworks on, and with that you might find yourself starved of food than of sex. Lol

{{5. Increases the bond }}

Though I wouldn’t really advise unprotected sex for those that aren’t married, but for those who are, sleeping naked helps gets more fleshy action, and this would increase the bond between you and your partner. With this, you get oxytocin more involved, and oxytocin has so many functions; of which one of them is to increase your happiness levels.
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6. Better skin }}

Sleeping naked allows ventilation around your body and this might be a good way of improving your skin. Acne and the rest of your skin problems might get evacuated if you employ the sleeping naked pattern.

{{7. Another source of anti-ageing }}

Sleeping naked might as well be a good source of anti-ageing; it would help the production of melatonin which is an anti-ageing hormone that would help keep your skin beautiful.

{{8. Better blood circulation }}

Underwear is sometimes made with elastic; an absence of undies, pyjamas and shirts would help in the flow of blow around body parts.

Sleeping naked not only helps you, it helps your relationship as well which was cited in this article. However, sleeping naked could as well be detrimental to your health. If your environment is mosquito infested, or infested with all manner of bugs and insects, sleeping naked defeats the purpose as you would bring more harm than good to yourself.

Also, sleeping naked when you have certain illnesses might expose your body to cold and that would have a bad effect as well.

Other than that, sleeping naked would be a plus.

{Most times the three things that fill a man’s head in a relationship are sex, sex and sex. I don’t even need any research to confirm that men are overly obsessed with sex; hardly would you see any man who can survive a relationship without getting a piece of the cake.}

I’m not trying to portray women as a gender without soul and passion or as people who don’t also crave for sex, no; I’m only saying that’s not all that matters; some things are important as well.

{{1. Attention }}

I haven’t seen a woman who doesn’t crave for attention from her man; attention makes a woman feel special, it makes her feel loved and relevant. Attention shouldn’t only come when he has an urge to satisfy, no; attention should be part and parcel of the relationship.

{{2. Faithful }}

There is this question that keeps going through my head and I still can’t think of a logical answer; why would a man ask a lady out, expect her to be faithful and still cheat? What’s the need? Every lady expects her man to be faithful at least; dating a cheat really hurts.

{{3. Make her feel loved }}

A woman basically goes into a relationship not just for the fact that she’s in love but she expects to be loved in return as well, and every sane lady in a relationship would choose love over s*x any time any day. Being loved by her man makes the relationship worth it.

{{4. Listen to her }}

Most men are guilty of not listening to what their lady have to say. Sometimes love and sex aren’t enough, those little things that follow are also important. If you can actually listen to your lady 99.9 percent then there would probably be fewer problems in that relationship.

{{5. Be there for her }}

You can’t imagine what goes through a lady’s head sometimes; the cause of the mood swing, the tears, the laugh, the smile, the worried face and every other thing means something. Sometimes all a lady just needs is a man who can be there for her at all times. If she has that kind of man; every worry, every fear would seem so little because she knows she has someone who cares and who would be there at all times.

{{6. Make her happy }}

Any man who can continually make his lady happy has not just the key to her heart but the spare key as well. These five things previously listed would make a lady happy but it doesn’t end there; those little dates, surprises, things that would make her smile and the lot would keep her happy, and that’s the key to a happy relationship.

A wise man once told me “the secret to a happy relationship is keeping your lady happy”; if she’s happy then the relationship would be happy.

Rihanna said it all in her song “only girl”, just make your lady feel like the only girl in the world.