Category: Social

{What if you knew that you had the power to attract either good or bad things to your life? However, many people end up attracting bad and negative things into their lives by their thoughts and actions.}

See some tips on how to attract good things into your life

{{1. Focus on what you want }}

To attract good things into your life, you must first have a clear view of what you truly want. What is it that you want? And when you have answered this question, never take your eyes off the prize.

{{2. Be good }}

You must have heard that like terms attract; it truly does, and in real life, if you want good things, you must be ready to attract good things.

{{3. Distance yourself from certain negatives}}

To attract good things, you must repel the bad. Negative energy gets in the way of attracting what you really want in life. Your friendships and the people you surround yourself with can be a source of negative energy, and they’ll gradually kill every positive thing going on in your life with their negative energy.

To attract good things, you must be ready to distance yourself from certain negatives.

{{4. Never let failure hold you back }}

Failure and difficult challenges will most likely try to block your path; good things don’t just come easy. When you let failure hold you down, then you’ll never see the other side of it, which is success.

To get to the other side, you must be ready to learn from and overcome failure.

{{5. Patience is key }}

Impatience has driven many people to their early graves. Patience is an important factor to attracting good things. It’s like planting a seed and expecting fruits within 24 hours. The joy of a seed bringing forth lies in the process which starts from germination to maturity stage of the tree.

{{6. Focus on the positives}}

Every situation has a positive and negative side to it; choose to open your heart to the positives. Seeing the positive side of things will lift your spirit, but if you choose to look at the negative side, your spirit will be dampened.

{{7. Don’t wait for things to happen }}

If you want good things in your life, you have to work your way to it; good things can’t just come to you just because you want them to. There’s always a working process, and you must be interested in that process.

We all want to attract good things to our life, but good things don’t just happen on its own.

A good person doesn’t just become good because he’s good; a good person is good because he does good things.

Source:Elcrema

{You might have the best partner and relationship in the world, but you wouldn’t know this because all you do is base your relationship on what you see on social media. You compare your relationship with the fakery on social media and fail to see the good things happening in your own relationship.}

I have nine genuine reasons why you should stop comparing your relationship to what you see on social media

{{1. People post their best moments on social media }}

One thing about social media is that you get to see the best of people’s worlds; they post their happy moments with their partners, vacations, wonderful outings and other fun moments. You could see this and create a bad image of yourself based on the best things happening in another person’s life.

{{2. You don’t get to see their pains }}

Take a look at social media and you’ll only get to see one side of the story — the glory. You don’t get to see the pains, the arguments and the misunderstanding. So when you compare your relationship with what you see on social media; you’ll only end up comparing your worst life with the best life of another couple, and that’s an unfair thing to do to yourself.

{{3. You fall to appreciate the good things going on in your relationship }}

When you start to see the good things happening in another person’s relationship via what they post on social media, you’ll tend to lose sight of the things happening in your relationship, and you will in turn fail to appreciate all the great things you have working for you.

{{4. You compare the wrong things }}

The worst thing about comparing your relationship with what you see on social media is that you will tend to focus more on the wrong things happening in your relationship and compare with the right things in the other person’s relationship, which isn’t right; your focus will only be on the highlighted wrong things happening in your own relationship. That’s what people get to compare whenever they compare their relationships.

{{5. You start to focus on what doesn’t matter }}

Communication, understanding, commitment — these are very important things that should be present in every relationship, but these are the things you won’t get to see on social media. At the end of the day, you will end up focusing on what doesn’t really matter in your relationship.

{{6. You start to choose fantasy over reality }}

The life you see on social media is the fantasy most people choose to share, and when you base your relationship on that; you will end up choosing fantasy over reality.

{{7. You slowly turn yourself into a terrible partner }}

The danger of focusing on people’s post on social media is that you’ll turn yourself into a terrible partner with each passing day. You complain and nag more, become complacent, unappreciative, ignorant, nonchalant and even disrespectful to your partner — these are some of the things social media will do to you.

{{8. You become distracted }}

Distractions start to set in when you focus your life on social media. Like every other thing in life, the moment you take your eyes off the prize, you start to lose focus, and you get distracted by what shouldn’t matter in the first place.

{{9. You start reading meaning into everything }}

Basing your relationship life on social media will make you see more of what doesn’t matter and less of what truly matters, and then you’d start to read meaning into what shouldn’t matter in your relationship.

Base your relationship on what you share with your partner and never for a second compare it to the false pictures you see on social media. Social media is like a wedding; everyone wears their best clothes and put on their best smiles, but it doesn’t truly mean everyone is rich and happy.

Source:Elcrema

{Improving the communication flow between you and your partner is a useful way to bettering your relationship. When the level of communication in your relationship is good, your relationship will also be better.}

The problem in many relationships is that partners don’t know how to communicate, and this leads to too many misunderstanding, quarrels and arguments.

These tips should help you communicate better with your partner:

{{1. Listen }}

Listening to your partner is probably the easiest part of communication, but unfortunately it’s the hardest part of many relationships. People hear their partner without really listening.

For communication to be effective, there has to be a listening ear.

{{2. Pay attention }}

Pay attention to your partner; pay attention to what your partner is saying and pay attention to your partner’s body language. Paying attention will reveal so many things that you need to know, and understanding will improve drastically when partners pay attention to each other.

{{3. Don’t interrupt }}

Many couples find it hard to communicate because they interrupt each other. When you both interrupt each other, it means no one is listening, and when no one is listening, there’s no way communication will be successful.

{{4. Don’t assume }}

Stop assuming. Assumptions will make you see something false as the reality. Don’t assume; it could give you the wrong perception about your partner.

{{5. Ask questions}}

Where you aren’t sure – ask questions. Asking questions will tell you all you need know, and this will save your relationship a lot of stress. Communication will be improved when you ask questions.

{{6. Even when you disagree }}

Even when you disagree with your partner, avoid yelling and being insulting. Rather try to present your opinion in a way that depicts love and respect.

{{7. Timing }}

Timing is also very important during communication. There could be a right and wrong time to talk to your partner about certain things, especially a difficult subject. Always try to get your timing right.

If you can improve the communication in your relationship, your relationship will reach unimaginable heights. Peace and understanding will be the benefits of an improved communication between you and your partner.

Source:Elcrema

{One thing that’s very consistent with most women is telling their man that they are fine even when it’s obvious that there’s something wrong. They’ll give you the “I’m fine” response and give an attitude almost throughout the day.}

Why do women do this? This is an age-long question many men have sought the answer to, but all to no avail.

This article will throw a bit more light on why women are fond of this.

{{1. They just expect you to know }}

A lot of the time, women just expect men to know everything happening around them without them having to reveal anything. Women just want you to know everything, and they believe it’s your job to pay attention and know what’s wrong.

{{2. They love the attention }}

Sometimes, they kind of love the attention this brings; they love it when you give them all your attention, when you are worried about their state and when you keep being concerned even after you’ve gotten the “I’m fine” response. Trust me; she’ll get angrier if you took her response literally.

{{3. They unconsciously want to see the sensitive nature in you }}

Women are the more sensitive ones; the motherly nature in them brings out a rare kind of sensitivity that men don’t have; this is why a mother will look into a child’s eyes and tell you that something is wrong with the child’s health, while a father wouldn’t notice a thing.

Women are sensitive that way, and they also want to see the sensitivity in their man when they are hurting from a situation that he probably didn’t cause.

{{4. They are too hurt to talk }}

More often than not, she might just be too hurt to talk, especially if the man has done something terrible to hurt her feelings. This is a major reason women hold back and give the “I’m fine” response.

When she tells you “I’m fine” and gives an attitude that says the opposite; she’s clearly passing a message that everything isn’t okay.

Source:Elcrema

{Just because a man bought you expensive gifts, kissed you, had an awesome sex with you doesn’t mean you mean the world to him. Some men are just players and tend to have some ladies as a side chick.}

{{Here are 13 signs you are just his side chick and nothing more}}

1. Public display of affection shouldn’t be an issue in any relationship. You are obviously his side chick if he pulls your hand away if you try to hold his hand in public or he avoids staying too close to you when in public.

2. You are his side chick if he avoids taking you out on dates or always takes you to the same place anytime he takes you out on a date. He does this to avoid the risk running into anyone when he’s with you.

3. You are his side chick if he keeps you away from his family and friends.

4. You are his side chick if he avoids taking photographs with you or stops you from posting a photo of the two of you on Facebook, Instagram or any of your social media accounts.

5. You are his side chick if he only hangs out with you at a particular time. That could be the time his girlfriend is always free.

6. You are his side chick if he speaks to you in a very formal tone without even addressing you by name more often than not when the two of you talk on phone.

7. You are his side chick if he frequently becomes unreachable at certain times. He’s probably with his girlfriend.

8. You are his side chick if he avoids adding you on any of his social media accounts. His girlfriend may snoop around his social media account and find out about you and that’s the last thing he wants.

9. You are his side chick if he won’t let you spend the night or wants you out of his apartment first thing in the morning. He definitely doesn’t want his girlfriend to come around and meet another woman in his apartment.

10. You are his side chick if he avoids posting pictures of you online. His girlfriend will demand answers if he posts photos of you online.

11. You are his side chick if he only calls you when he wants to get laid. He rarely calls you to just check on you.

12. You are his side chick if he avoids making plans in advance and usually waits until the last second.

13. You are his side chick if he won’t let you see his phone. He doesn’t want you going through his phone because he might have something to hide like pictures and messages from the other woman.

Source:Elcrema

{I previously wrote about the qualities of a good wife and it’s important I balance the article by also writing about the qualities a good husband should have.}

If you desire to be the husband every woman would love to have, here are 30 qualities of a good husband

1. A good husband loves the good qualities of his wife while also accepting her flaws. He doesn’t make his wife feel guilty for having the flaws she has.

2. A good husband is willing to accept responsibility for his mistakes and doesn’t seek to look for who to blame.

3. A good husband trusts his wife and doesn’t see the need to stalk her by prying into her phone and laptop to seek for evidence of cheating.

4. A good husband is always there for his wife when she needs him even when it’s not convenient for him.

5. A good husband consults his wife before taking any major financial decisions.

6. A good husband spends quality time with his wife and doesn’t allow his busy schedule to deprive him of spending quality time with his wife.

7. A good husband respects his wife and always considers her when making any decision, whether big or small.

8. A good husband should always strive to meet the needs of his family financially.

9. A good husband is dependable and someone his wife can always rely on.

10. A good husband brings out the best in his wife.

11. A good husband doesn’t kill the dreams and aspirations of his wife.

12. A good husband always compliments his wife and never stops telling her the things he likes about her.

13. A good husband is always willing to put in effort to ensure the marriage works.

14. A good husband doesn’t believe chivalry id dead and always seek for ways to treat his wife like a queen that she is.

15. A good husband helps out with chores at home.

16. A good husband knows how to make his wife laugh.

17. A good husband honours his wife in public.

18. A good husband is trustworthy and makes his wife feel safe with him.

19. A good husband will never hit his wife.

20. A good husband doesn’t neglect his wife’s sexual needs. He ensures he satisfies her in the bedroom.

21. A good husband is willing to make compromises to ensure he makes his wife happy.

22. A good husband respects the family and friends of his wife.

23. A good husband will never cheat on his wife.

24. A good husband will always apologise when he is wrong and isn’t proud.

25. A good husband is also be a good father to his kids.

26. A good husband always makes his wife come first.

27. A good husband is be a good listener. Every wife wants to be heard.

28. A good husband takes good care of his looks and never lets himself go.

29. A good husband is generous.

30. A good husband is sensitive to the needs of his wife.

Source:Elcrema

{Our friends are there for us to share our life with but there are certain things about your relationship you should never share with your friends.}

{{Check them out below}}

{{1. Arguments with your partner }}

Every couple have arguments sometimes in their relationship but it’s wrong running to your friends to discuss every argument you had with your partner. The problem with telling your friends about arguments with your partner is that your friends will always remember them even after you and your partner have forgiven each other.

{{2. Sex}}

Discussing what happens in the bedroom with your friends is really wrong. Whatever happens in the bedroom should stay in the bedroom. Your friends don’t need to hear a detailed discussion about what happened last night with your partner. You should respect your relationship and avoid discussing private details with your friends.

{{3. Comparisons with your ex }}

It’s wrong to compare your partner with your ex during discussions with your friends. Unless you want your friends to think badly about your partner, you shouldn’t compare your partner to an ex in front of your friends. Comparisons can lead to unrealistic expectations which is damaging to a relationship.

{{4. Money problems }}

It’s wrong to discuss your partner’s money problems with your friends. This is never advisable. It’s okay talking about yours with your friends but it’s never okay to talk about your partner’s money problems with friends. You disrespect your partner when you discuss your partner’s money problems with your friends.

{{5. Your partner’s secrets }}

Your partner confided in you before telling you his/her secret and your partner trusts you not to discuss his/her secrets with anyone. Telling your friends about your partner’s secrets will destroy your partner’s faith in you. Even when you and your partner stop being together, you should still keep his/her secrets.

Source:Elcrema

{When a man is interested in a woman, he probably makes a move but it isn’t the same way with most women who would rather give out signs as a form of invitation.}

So what are the signs a woman gives that shows she’s interested in you?

Here are 15 signs that show that pretty lady is interested in you

1. She likes your Facebook posts and comments on your posts even if she’s not really interested in the post.

2. She’s livelier when you’re around her and tends to laugh more. Some girls however might be quieter around a guy they are interested in.

3. Your calls, SMS and chats to her are replied so quickly that sometimes you wonder if she’s been expecting it.

4. How her friends react when you are around would also give a clue. Do they suddenly disperse to leave the two of you alone together? This could mean she has told them about you.

5. You make her laugh uncontrollably even though you aren’t really the funny type.

6. She pays so much attention to you when you talk to her and enjoys having a conversation with you.

7. When having a conversation with you, she takes care not to mention any other guy so you won’t get the idea you have competition. She wants to give you the impression that she’s single.

8. She appears uncomfortable or looks down when you see her with another man because she’s worried you will think she has a thing for the other guy.

9. She dresses her best when she’s meeting you. Sometimes you have this feeling she’s overdressed for the occasion but she’s trying to impress you.

10. If she compliments you a lot and even compliments something you did which wasn’t all that great, she’s interested in you.

11. She will notice little details about you like the way you dress, your smell, your favourite music etc.

12. A girl who is interested in you will always want to know if you are single or in a relationship. If she asks you if you have a girlfriend or if you like anyone, it could mean she’s interested in you.

13. She will touch you a lot more than she touches the average person and she will tend to let you touch her in return.

14. She will show a sudden interest in things you like but she’s not so big on.

15. A girl who is interested in you might lean towards you more, play with her hair when you are around or tilt her head.

Source:Elcrema

{Roughly 80 percent of people around the globe identify with some type of religion, and scientists have been seriously pursuing insight into the evolutionary benefit of religious practice since the early part of this century. In a new study published in Nature Human Behaviour, Eleanor Power of the Santa Fe Institute writes that active religious participation may benefit practitioners by strengthening social bonds.}

While some anonymized, lab-based experiments have suggested that religious behavior may increase prosocial qualities like generosity and trustworthiness, few researchers have studied this question in the context of a real community. In her study, Power analyzes how the nature of peoples’ religious practice correlates with the structure of their social support networks in two villages in South India.

How people embody their religion in public can vary in difficulty and costliness. A single trip to attend a religious service doesn’t require much effort or money, but regular visits require greater commitment. Sacrificial offerings may not be difficult, but they are expensive. Some activities, like making a long pilgrimage or piercing the body with hooks and spears, are both physically and financially demanding.

Community members who invest more in religious activity are viewed as being more trustworthy and generous. Consequently, these people are often sought out by others who need support. While this can create a burden, it also helps to foster more mutually supportive relationships. “Providing support to others means that one is more able to draw on support oneself,” writes Power in the new paper.

“These religious acts make a lot of sense when you look at the social benefit,” says Power. In the South Indian communities in this study, most residents are poor, don’t have access to bank accounts, and they rely on family and friends to help with farming, home-building and other crucial tasks. “So if your religious practice influences the likelihood and strength of those relationships, you’ll be much better able to withstand the vagaries of life.”

Source:Science Daily

{There are rumour mongers everywhere, and it’s common to have fallen into the trap of rumour mongers.}

It’s very important to know how to handle rumours about yourself, because if you don’t, those rumours could get the better of you and affect you negatively.

These are six things you should do when you hear a rumour about yourself.

{{1. Be confident }}

Being confident when things which are untrue are being said about you is a very important way to handle rumours. When you are confident, you give the rumour-plotters something else to think about.

{{2. Never show frustration }}

People plotting rumours against you expect you to show frustration and lose your cool. You play into their traps when you do this. So, never get frustrated because of rumours; see rumours as what it really is — lies.

{{3. Communicate }}

When you hear something untrue about you, communicate with the people who matter to you and people in higher authority, like your boss if possible.

{{4. Clarify the situation }}

Present facts to clarify the situation.

{{5. Don’t try too hard }}

Don’t try too hard to impress anyone. When you become desperate to clear the rumours, people might actually believe the rumours are true.

{{6. Be positive }}

Remain positive no matter the situation, keep a smiling face and never lose your joy because of news that are untrue.

It might seem difficult to do all these, but it’s way better to handle rumours this way than to get frustrated.

Source:Elcrema