The inequality was grounded in both laws and culture, making men feel superior while women had to accept their position, some happily, others as a last resort.
And now, laws and more efforts are breaking the status quo.
The law governing persons and family adopted two years ago brought change as the fact that now both spouses – man and woman – are jointly responsible for the management of the household, including moral and material support as well as its maintenance as article 209 of the law puts it.
More concerted efforts have seized advantage of Rwanda’s political will to promote gender balance and fight Gender-Based Violence (GBV).
One of the efforts now bearing fruits is Indashyikirwa project, loosely translated as agents of change.
David Nkundibiza, 37, was once a GBV perpetrator against his wife Clementine Nyirantegerejimana, 36.
The couple has been married for 10 years and has three children. However, the dawn struck recently into the family that lives in Jomba Sector of Nyabihu District where the couple is championing GBV fight in the community.
With his infant on his back in a conference room at the Kigali Convention Centre on Tuesday, Nkundibiza surprises many as they find it strange for a man to put a baby on his back while his wife is around.
Nkundibiza told the media that his mind wasn’t any different a few years ago.
“I grew up raising my younger siblings but it all changed when I became a man and got my own babies. I believed taking care of children is up to women,” he said.
On his side, his wife Nyirantegerejimana says she was formerly burdened by most of the household’s chores alone plus babysitting their children as her husband, Nkundibiza, was often going to the bar immediately after working on the farm together with her.
She says her husband has now changed to share all tasks as they also share ideas on what to do for the benefit of their family.
Their testimony is one of the many being shared around the country where trained activists helped families get rid of GBV through different channels including women space forum, community meetings and going from house to house.
The couple was attending the closing of Indashyikirwa project in Kigali, Tuesday. Both are now community counsellors under the project which reached 83,535 direct beneficiaries, women representing 55%, in seven districts around the country over the last four years. The activists shared lessons with around 1.3 million in the areas.
Call for project expansion
Speaking at the ceremony, Minister for Gender and Family Promotion, Espérance Nyirasafari, said Indashyikirwa project has been instrumental in fighting GBV in the communities it operated.
She said she witnessed the change in Musanze District during her recent visit.
“Government is committed to building on these achievements. I ask partners in this area to closely work with us to expand this to other parts of the country. If we scale up this in other parts, GBV will be eradicated in few years.”
Indashyikirwa project operated 14 sectors in seven districts from September 2014 to August 2018. The districts are Bugesera, Kayonza, Rwamagana, Burera, Musanze, Nyabihu and Rubavu.
Marie Immaculée Ingabire, a human rights activist and Chairperson of Transparency International Rwanda, cautioned that the project’s achievements would go to waste in a few years if they are not sustained.
“GBV is a crime, it should be reported and fought hard but I’m worried for tomorrow in the same areas where this project has been implemented. I know a lot of work has been done there but wait a year after the project has ended, when nobody is following up on what’s happening there, it will be like nothing was done.”
Funded by UK’s Department for International Development (DFID) under the coordination of Care International, Indashyikirwa project was implemented by Rwanda Women’s Network (RWN) and Rwanda Men’s Resource Centre (RWAMREC).
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